Good night, sweet prince: And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest...
-William Shakespeare


It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.
-Rose Kennedy

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Sunday

Another week gone by. I learn more about myself with each passing week. I am stronger than I ever thought possible. I am still standing and moving about life. I still have a heart!

My Grandmother is in the hospital and she is one of the most important people in my life. We share the loss of our first born sons. Sad as it is, I think it bonds us even more than we already were. Of course, she went on to have four more children. I on the other hand am not sure wether or not I will be blessed with other children or if William will be my only. Anyhow, back to Gram, she is doing better and nothing too incredibly bad, although you never know in this life. She will be in the hospital for a few more days but should get to go home by the end of the week.

So, I still have a heart, it was nice to know that I could get over myself for one day and go see her. I didn't really even want to talk about all of our losses. I just wanted to talk the way we did before all of this happened. So, we did and it was nice. She is a great comfort for me and she helps to keep me grounded.

So, like I said another week has past, I am getting stronger emotionally and I have not forgotten about my son in the process. I remember him more and more with each passing day. I miss him more and more also but I know that we, Shan and I, will be alright. We will get through, not over, not ever over (don't want that) but we will get through this together and stronger than ever before.

I wish everyone else strength and peace this week. I hope I, along with the rest of you can find more strength and peace with each passing day. I can hope can't I?

6 comments:

Antigone said...

Be Brave. Be Strong. Be Happy.

Antigone said...

Tomorrow's your day 60. I'll think of you and William.

Katie said...

I echo your thoughts on how strong you are. But don't ever feel that you have to "get over" yourself. Yes, you have to make room in your life for compassion for others, but most importantly, have that compassion for yourself. What you have lost and endured, well it cannot be measured.

Thinking of you and William today.

c. said...

That is what I find the most difficult, going on, being happy, living without him. I feel like I'm doing such a disservice to his memory. That in being okay, he wasn't worth enough to me. It's so hard.

Thinking of you and William today, hon. XO.

HLHArts said...

I am so happy to hear the strength and hope back with you. Even if you lose sight of it again in the coming days and weeks, try to remember that it is there inside you and you will find it again.

Carole said...

My grandmother and I share the loss of a child as well...and it's hard to explain that bond to anyone else. Thinking of you...
~Carole