Good night, sweet prince: And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest...
-William Shakespeare


It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.
-Rose Kennedy

Friday, February 29, 2008

I Got it!


Today in the mail I received Williams Certificate of Birth resulting in Stillbirth.
You know the part that made me cry? It says Child's Name: William Henry Johnson, see he is a child! He isn't a fetus as the Fetal Death Report says. He's a child and it makes me sad that I had to fight for a damned piece of paper but I did!

I got it! I now have all of the ammo I need to contact my state representatives which mind you one lives 10 minutes away and I voted for him! Now, he can return the favor! Being as he had a sign in my yard and yes I am a constituent, favor must now be returned!

I will take him pictures of my son, tell him my story and tell him the fight I had to get the piece of paper I wanted! I will tell him that NO woman should ever have to fight for this, that I will help however I can to make sure no other woman ever has to go through what I did. I'll keep you posted!

As you can tell I am happy that I got this piece of paper but I am sad too. It almost solidifies the fact that the only way I have my son is in ashes and paper. Not the way a mother wants to bring her child home. Yet in the same respects with this paper I feel I have now truly brought William home.


15 comments:

Antigone said...

One of the most touching moments in the hospital was when my doctor left me in my room and I overheard him asking the nurse in the hallway, "Where is the child?"

Antigone said...

I've checked in w/ 2 specialists in addition to my OB and they all agree. I might be able to find someone who will placate me a little more or give me some hope - but the science seems to all be consistant: I just suck reproductively.

Brenda said...

I am so proud of you. I am also happy you got the certificate. I really find it so strange that something as simple as a birth certificate, but also something that is SO important has to be begged for. Like it should matter to those in charge!
I say go knock on his door. Do take all your photos. And make him listen to you.

Hugs
xxx
www.lifecanbeashit.wordpress.com

ps. Your photos of William are beautiful and Im so thankful you have been able to share them with us.

c. said...

Yay, Amy. I'm happy (?, not the right word, I don't think) for you. You'll be happy to know I'm working on getting mind, in whole part to you. I am not sure how I will feel when it gets here, but I am so happy to know my son will get some recognition.
XO.

c. said...

Ya, I'm working on getting "mind". LOL. I am working on getting MINE, is what I meant.

And while I'm here, I hope you are able to initiate some changes in the way other mothers get access to their babies' COB resulting in stillbirth. Know I'll be cheering you on all the way.

Ange said...

Amy I am so pleased you managed to get that piece of paper. In Australia it is quite different and in fact you needed to fill in the birth certificate documentation before doing the death because of course..in the correct order is birth and death. We were warned that the death certificate might reach us via mail before the birth one..which was nice of them to be sensitive too. Hope you get some answers and make it easier for other women in your State.

Angelisa said...

Amy,

I'm so glad to hear that you got what you deserved! And, I hope that by fighting for this to be your right, other women will follow you!

nancy said...

I must have simply clicked on Mel's link and not seen there was an update when I posted last night. Regardless, my post last night wouldn't of changed had I seen your update.

I am ~so happy~ that you've received it. I also can understand how sad it is too, that it's final.

I hope you continue to advocate this. You can be the reason no other grieving mother and father have to go through this. I'm very proud of you for doing what you did. Now it's time to get a little media for it. Have you thought about contacting your city's paper to do a story about it?

CLC said...

I am glad you got it too. My state (PA) is currently trying to pass it. I have lobbied all of my friends and relatives to email their reps. I am hopeful it will pass, because all we really want is our children to be acknowledged.

Rosalind said...

I'm so happy you got it..and understand that bittersweet feeling you have...But the fight really is so worth it..isn't it?

Carrie said...

I'm so pleased your perseverance has paid off. Your son deserves this recognition.
Be proud of yourself xx

shinejil said...

I am so glad you got this, and so sorry you had to fight to hard to get it.

Ashleigh said...

It's seems like an odd thing to say I'm happy for you for but I know you understand what I mean.

kalakly said...

Good for you! I have had links regarding this very issue up on my blog for a while now, feel free to use them for all they are worth. I know how important this is to so many moms, it's just so f'ed up to have to fight for it isn't it????

patrice said...

I'm glad you got this birth certificate. When Cole's death certificate came, it said in big letters at the top "No Given Name". Buried somewhere else in the cert was his "alias": Cole Kaya. I am now writing letters, filling out endless forms (not to mention writing checks) to get my boy's name on his death certificate. These things can make you crazy.

But good for you.