Good night, sweet prince: And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest...
-William Shakespeare

It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.
-Rose Kennedy

Sunday, June 1, 2008

I'm BACK!!

I hope you are all doing well. I will be spending a good part of my week catching up with all of your posts…I will try to catch up by Thursday this week!

We’ve been busy; I need to apologize to those of you with G.Reader. You may very well have seen 2-3 of the same post regarding a song and my Nieces pre-school graduation. Yes, it is something I wanted to share but was too lazy and working too fast to get it done appropriately. I will try to repost it at a later date!

The busy part…Shan’s Dad stayed with us for 2 weeks. He’s a go-getter…kept Shan on his toes and wore him slick! It’s not a bad thing but not a great thing either! It’s always nice to have his dad with us but it’s also nice to get our personal space back! I’m not a very good person to share space with. I’m kind of bitchy and VERY set in my ways! I am NOT a morning person and truly dislike being spoken to before I am ready. Luckily, Shan’s dad knows this…most days! Shan on the other hand is a different story…he eggs on my crappy attitude. That’s actually a different post all together!

So, I took time away and yet I still poked my head through the door on occasion to check in. I didn’t make it to everyone, obviously or you would have seen comments galore I am sure. I missed you all A LOT! It’s very hard for me to stay away from peeking my head around the corner to check in. You are all my addiction and sometimes I need the break from this addiction to feed another.

We have another round of “stuff” coming up in our personal lives and yet some more mile stones (sounds like the wrong thing to say) coming up for us regarding William. Six months in only 12 days away now…doesn’t seem like it can be six months yet. We have our first Steam Show (I’ll explain later!) in just over 2 weeks and I was so looking forward to having William with us at this event. It’s going to be very difficult and of course before the show we have the dreaded Father’s Day. I am not sure how Shan will handle this. Me, I may stay in bed after I tell him what a wonderful Daddy, I know he is.

Lately, I have had yet another round of ups and downs, more ups I think than downs but I’m not exactly sure about that either. I spent Memorial Day at the cemetery placing flowers on a head stone of a good friend who passed six months ago. My losses should all be in another post all together but the short end of the stick is this… August 2007 lost my Cat of 13 years, November 2007 lost a good friend to a freak blood clot, and William’s God Parents lost their fur kid (our fur nephew) to cancer the day after our friend died and then of course, 2 weeks after the friend died we lost our William. I went to the cemetery and then to the infant memorial at the hospital. While at the infant memorial, in the field next to the stone were a herd of cattle…they watched me…I spoke to them…for every baby I could name there was a cow to match. Ironic sure, wishful thinking that they were all watching me, probably but kind of cute just the same! I think the six-month mark is just going to hit me like a brick as the build up is already weighing me down. I guess we’ll have to see.

I do want to thank you all for being here and being my addiction, I am not sure how I would get through any of this without all of you!

ETA: The pee stick was negative, I'm alright with that though! Not exactly ready, I don't think! Maybe next time!


k@lakly said...

I am glad you are back. I hope the next few weeks go easy on your heart. I missed you and your perky comments!!

Katie said...

So glad that you are back! I missed you!

Sorry about the BFN, but I am glad that you seem to be doing okay with it.

Did you ever get the package that I sent you?

CLC said...

Glad you are back. Sorry it was negative this month. Here's to next month.

c. said...

Glad you're back, Amy. Sorry about the negative...they suck regardless.

Aunt Becky said...

You know that I missed you, love. Glad you're back.

Coggy said...

Yay! Glad you're back too. I hope that you find the balance you need between here and real life. It is tough. I've struggled with it a lot.

Still Standing Strong in A Bloom of Hope. said...

So so glad you're back! Got a bit worried for you but figured you'd come back, when you're ready..

I'm sorry about having a BFN this month. But am glad that you're trying to be positive about it. Me too, I'm trying to be positive this month.


Tash said...

Sorry I haven't been here in eons -- my google reader/bloglist are so f'd up right now, and I've had no time to sit and futz with either of them . . . (blah)

Sorry for the BFN. I'm glad you're in a place where you even feel like trying/checking. And six months is awful, IMO. There are just too many milestones under the bridge, but that one is rough. Thinking of you.