I'll raise a glass of something (beer, eggnog, wine, water) to us all tonight. Albeit before midnight. I'm hoping for a better 2009 for all of us.
This last year I was mired in my grief. I didn't do anything to help myself physically. I gained weight while I was pregnant and I kept in on after I lost William. I plan on losing weight this year. Is that a resolution? No, it's a promise I'd like to keep to myself. I started smoking again after I lost William. I'd like to promise myself that I will quit that nasty habit too. So what are my resolutions? I can't say that I truly have any. Maybe one could or should be that I resolve to clean my house every week. I resolve to organize my life. Ok, so that's 2. Maybe those are the two that I know I can stick to. I would like to resolve to be a kinder person, one who cares more about others than myself. To be honest, there's a part of me who wants to care more about me than anyone else. I can't say that I have ever done that one for myself.
I'm co-dependent, others problems are so much easier for me...they don't affect me directly and I can say a lot of things to help others. I never, well, almost never take my own advice. Maybe I should learn to do that this next year.
So, instead of resolutions tonight I will make wishes. I have a lot of wishes for 2009. I'll start the list here and now. Maybe by writing it down, I will feel like they may very well be granted.
Wish List for 2009
1. To find peace
2. For all of us to have happy, healthy lives and babies (happy, healthy ones)in this coming year!
3. For someone to find a cure for ALL cancers!
4. For us all to live long lives plus see number 2!
5. To reconnect with family and friends that I have pushed away in the last year.
6. To spend more time with my Gram!
7. For world peace!(Yes, that sounds like a Play.boy Play.mate answer but it's true!)
8. For Shan and I to get married.
9. For a couple of vacations this year (Didn't take a single one last year and really need a couple this year!)
10. To pay off all debt...yes this would require winning the Powe.rba.ll but hey, a girl can dream and this is a wish list!
So, tell me what are your resolutions or your wishes for 2009?
ETA: I edited this for the stupid spelling errors I made! Sorry!